Teach Violence

Come on, parents, get yr boys started young! Teach them that violence (and especially gang violence, as they’ll learn playing tackle football) is the best way to solve life’s little problems.

Sweet on someone who doesn’t return your affections? Tackle that recalcitrant lover and show them who’s boss! Got a boss who won’t recognize your enviable talents? Apply those skills you learned in the third grade!

Yes, you too can be a brick in the giant pyramid scheme called football. College and pro ball rely on millions of little boys (and their ignorant parents) to build the foundation for the successful manipulation of testosterone into profits for fat, beer-swilling owners! And don’t forget the service you’re doing for the fans: they eat bread and watch the gridiron circus as you get your brains pummeled. Don’t worry, though, capitalist healthcare has your back–yeah, that knife, that one right there…

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s